Champagne Problems Critique – Netflix’s Latest Holiday Romantic Comedy Misses the Sparkle.
Without wanting to sound like a holiday cynic, it’s hard not to lament the premature release of holiday movies prior to the Thanksgiving holiday. While temperatures drop, it feels premature to fully indulge in the platform’s yearly buffet of low-cost holiday entertainment.
Like US candy that no longer contain real chocolate, the service’s Christmas films are counted on for their style of badness. They offer predictable elements – nostalgic casting, modest spending, fake snow, and absurd premises. At worst, these films are unmemorable disasters; at best, they are lighthearted distractions.
The new Netflix film, the newest holiday concoction, disappears into the broad center of the forgettable spectrum. Directed by Mark Steven Johnson, who previously last Netflix romcom was so disposable, this movie feels like cheap bubbly – fittingly lackluster and context-dependent.
The story starts with what appears to be a computer-made commercial for supermarket sparkling wine. This ad is actually the proposal of the main character, played by Minka Kelly, to her colleagues at the Roth Group. Sydney is the stereotypical image of a professional female – underestimated, phone-obsessed, and driven to the harm of her private world. After her superior dispatches her to France to finalize an acquisition over Christmas, her sibling insists she take one night in the city to enjoy life.
Naturally, Paris is the perfect place to wrest one away from digital navigation, even when the city is covered in below-grade CGI snow. In an absurdly cutesy bookstore, the lead has a charming encounter with Henri Cassell, who distracts her from her phone. As demanded by the genre, she at first rejects this ideal guy for frivolous excuses.
Just as predictable are the movie mechanics that proceed at sudden shifts, mirroring the rotation of aging champagne bottles in the vaults of the family vineyard. The catch? Henri is the heir to Chateau Cassel, hesitant to run it and resentful toward his dad for selling it. Maybe the film’s biggest addition to the genre, Henri is extremely judgmental of private equity. The conflict? The heroine sincerely believes she’s not dismantling the ancestral business for profit, vying against three caricatures: a stern Frenchwoman, a severe blonde German man, and an out-of-touch wealthy man.
The twist? Sydney’s shady colleague Ryan shows up without warning. The grist? The two leads gaze longingly at each other in holiday pajamas, despite a vast chasm in economic worldview.
The upside and downside is that nothing here lingers beyond a short-lived thrill on an unfilled belly. There is no substantial content – Minka Kelly, still best known for her part in Friday Night Lights, gives a merely adequate portrayal, superficially pleasant and acts of kindness, more maternal than romantic lead. Tom Wozniczka provides just the right amount of French charm with mild self-torture and nothing more. The gimmicks are unfunny, the love story is harmless, and the ending is straightforward.
Despite its philosophizing on the exclusivity of sparkling wine, no one is pretending this is anything but a mass market item. The things to hate are the very reasons some enjoy it. One might call an expert’s opinion about the film a minor issue.
- Champagne Problems is now available on Netflix.
